Sam I Am Too
CS: You’re me!
FR: I’m not you.
CS: Yes, you are.
CS: Sure you’re not, but if you’re not me, then who are you?
FR: I’m Sam
CS: Me too! See, you are me!
FR: Whoa there turbo!
CS: Alright fine, but if you’re not me, then how do you know about that time in the fourth grade where I-
FR: Where you whoopee cushioned that guy after the pledge? Haha
CS: Ah-Hah! You are me, or else you wouldn’t know that.
FR: Yes I would, I watched you do it. I was in that class.
CS: Of course you were- you’re me!
FR: No. I sat in the back row, third seat from the corner.
CS: hey! Me too!
FR: Really? That’s pretty cool.
FR: Hold on… you sat in the same seat as me? How’s that work?
CS: Simple- We are the same person. Duh.
Both: This is weird. Stop talking at the same time as me! No you stop.
CS: Hey you started it!
FR: What? This is all your crazy idea, not mine.
CS: Whoa there turbo.
FR: That’s not funny. I don’t know what you’re trying to pull here but it needed to be over five minuets ago.
CS: I’m not pulling anything. Look, I’m telling you- we’re the same person!
FR: Right… Well I’m going to go call someone to get you some help ok.
CS: Ok. I’ll call too- cuz we’re the same person! You don’t seem to get it.
FR: Right. Anyway. Hello. Yes, I’d like to report a mentally disturbed person who’s been terrorizing me.
CS: Don’t listen to her! She’s insane!
FR: Hey! You’re the crazy one!
CS: What are you talking about?
FR: What are you talking about? Yes, I’m still here.
CS: Me too.
Both: Get off the phone! This is my call. You get off!
CS: Look, shut up, I really don’t have time for these childish games.
FR: You’re the one who started it. Besides, if I’m you, then you’re telling yourself to shut up.
CS: Ah-ha! So you admit it! You’re me!
FR: If I admit it will you leave?
CS: Yes I’ll- Hey! What are you talking about? If I leave you’d have to leave too!
FR: How about this, we leave together and then I ditch you!
CS: Ok! Wait, that doesn’t work!
FR: Sure it does! Watch… This is me leaving!
CS: Wait! I know how to explain this! Maybe we’re in an inter-dimensional portal and-
FR: No. That’s just stupid.
CS: Fine! I can see I’m not appreciated here, so I’m leaving.
FR: Good, go torment someone else.
CS: Don’t worry, I’m sure you will.
FR: Whatever. Bye now.
CS: Bye now.
Both: This has been one hell of a weird day.