Trudging Through the Forest

So much has happened since the last time I’ve written here.  So many times I’ve thought about what I would write.  I still have many of the drafts in my head… I tend to journal when things are dark.  I write to purge the negativity.  When there is no one for me to talk to, I journal.  It’s a bit sad to know that and see how many journals and such I’ve filled.  I think that when I’m happy and things are going well, I try to live more in the moment.  I embrace life.  To move past the shadows of life I write so I can keep moving forward instead of getting locked into a worry cyclone.  Also, I tell Boyfriend much of what I’d tell a journal so when I sit down to write I feel like I’m repeating myself.  And whenever I have a gap in something like this journal or blog… I never know if I should address the gap, go over what’s happened since I last wrote, or if I should just dive back into the drama.  I feel undisciplined.  I need to write everyday.  But I don’t… I’m ready to be happy and I don’t want to be in the forest forever.

 

(Author’s Note:  I still struggle with the thoughts expressed in this entry.  I still tend to tell Husband all the things I would journal.  I still don’t write as much as I should.  I still feel undisciplined.  I still mostly write to purge the darkness and don’t record the light because I’m too busy keeping my face towards the sun.  I just do the best I can with what I have and try to let that be enough.)

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